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Despite. Despise. Destroy.

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Hoo boy. [Oct. 26th, 2005|10:48 pm]
[mood | content]
[music |Three Six Mafia - Stay Fly]

Hmm..Well. I've started work. It ain't that bad. Not like people make it out to be. Hell, it's kinda fun, actually. I do feel guilty in taking pleasure in causing inconvienience to others. Oh well. It's a job. Next weekend...I go and visit Kate. I'm a little excited about that. She lives up in Conneticut...but, ah, whatever. It's worth the long drive. <3
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Ugh. [Oct. 13th, 2005|11:18 am]
[mood | contemplative]
[music |Foo Fighters - DOA]

Well...I woke up this morning. Raining again. Wow, It feels like the pacific northwest up here..with all of this constant raining. Like there's nothing to look forward to in life. One of my friends lost her grandfather. I just generally hate the concept of death now. I mean..spending all that time with someone, and then you have to say goodbye? I wish things weren't like that. I wish people didn't die. Couldn't die. Well..I wish that physically they can die..but then they can reappear as an astral projection...that their loved ones can see and hear. That way...they'd never be dead..or lost. ...What the hell am I talking about. That's childish. Silly me. People need to feel closure to their lives. People would be tormented if they didn't. Finding no end...no final answer. I believe that somewhere in your life..namely in your prime..you ask yourself a question. But you can't answer it right then...or later on. That's the question you find the answer to, when you finally pass. Either you'd die with a grin or die with a frown. And nobody knows it but you. Eh...I'm rambling again. TO THE BATCAVE, ROBIN !!!
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Story of my life... [Oct. 13th, 2005|01:44 am]
[mood | mellow]

Hm..this song relates to the story of my life.

Had a bad day, don't talk to me,
gonna ride this out,
My little black heart, breaks apart,
with your big mouth.

And I'm sick of my sickness
Don't touch me, you'll get this.
I'm useless, lazy, perverted,
and you hate me.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wakeup call,
And everything, everything's my fault.

Went to the doctor, and I asked her,
to make this stop. (whoa)
Got medication, a new addiction,
Fucking thanks a lot.

I had to relapse, I'm bad at rehabs
It ruins everything. (whoa)
So point your finger, at the singer,
He's in the pharmacy.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wake up call,
and everything's my fault.

You can't save me,
You can't blame me,
Well I'm waiting here to take a fall,
and everything, and everything's my fault.

And I'm a death threat haven't slept yet,
Baby why the wake up call
I'm the bad boy tell the tabloids
everything's my fault.

Whoa whoa whoa yeah, write it write it,
Whoa Whoa whoa everything's my fault,
everything's my fault.

I went to heaven, but couldn't get in,
For what I have done.
I said please take me, they said you're crazy
you had too much fun.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wake up call,
and everything's my fault.

You can't save me,
You can't blame me,
Well I'm waiting here to take a fall,
and everything, everything's my fault.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
You can't save me,
You can't change me,
You can't save me,
You can't change me,(everything's my fault)
You can't save me,
You can't change me,

Everything's my fault.


Unwritten Law - Save Me
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My first Entry // it's a fucking doozy. [Oct. 13th, 2005|01:24 am]
[mood | frustrated]
[music |Unwritten Law - Save Me]

Well..I've been in a weird mood lately. An extremely weird mood lately. I've been miserable..and the littlest things make me upset. Both online, and IRL. And I bet the whole world is begging to know why. I'll tell them. It's that...when it comes right down to it. my so-called " friends " act like I'm not worth a damn. That's fine..because whatever respect I had for them just went out the window. It's all good. Ha, and women...people think I'm just the regular Jude Law. Well..I'm just the flavor of the week to most women. I'm the man of the moment..there for the moment, to give in to every beckon call. Bend over backwards to save the day for the moment..and then tomorrow I'm yesterday's news. I wasn't meant to be treated like that. I welcomed the thought at first...but it's leading to my premature demise. That's why I revert to my " fuck the world, it's all on me. " attitude. That attitude has gotten me through so many situations. Because I've realized what's important. And that is me. Myself. Everyone can take a back burner to me..because my days of being selfless are over. I'm just sick of it...the lack of respect...the shunning. And then they wonder why I get the way I do at times like these. Oh the fuck well. I'm at a loss to do whatever right now.
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